Discovering Sat nam Rassayan

I dropped into Yoga West for the full moon meditation last week, and ended up getting a double bill of amazingness! After the full moon meditation I was talking to a teacher. Over his shoulder I saw through the window of the Gurdwara, the sacred room where the holy text is kept, and Nirmal, a teacher trainer on the teacher training course was in there with a few other people. I inquired about the event and loved the answer… It was a class teaching healing, where you practice healing and receive a healing, and I could join! I was all over it, it sounded like my kind of thing!

In this ‘Sat Nam Rassayan’ class I learned profoundly about the importance of aiming in every moment for Shuniya – a still point, a state of zero where the ego is brought to complete stillness.  I learned that being in relationship with others from this place means that I get to communicate with the souls of others, rather than their ego’s, from my ego. I had previously read David Hawkin’s book, Power Versus Force, and this book came to mind. Hawkins writes about his experience of curing incurable illnesses, curing catatonic patients, bringing people out of coma’s - all from communicating directly with the soul. He writes that one day he found he was able to see the soul in his patients, which is always in good health, and says that only the ego is ever suffering and ill. He said that he would simply remind the soul who they really are, the soul, not the ego, and then the sickness of the ego – who they imagined themselves to be, would leave. A new ward in New York was opened up just for his patients, because he was rapidly curing so many people at one time. This was before he chose to try and heal more people en masse, rather than ‘a cup of rice at a time’, as he put it, by going into seclusion to research and write.

These following particular aspects of the teachings of the Sat Nam Rassayan class were hugely impactful for me this week; To keep focusing on the five senses within our bodies while in relationship to others, and while in our relationship to our environment, to anything really. Not listening to the mind talking, and to just listen to the five senses alone for information. Keeping shuniya the whole time, coming back to a still point over and over, making sure I am in constant remembrance of my intention to be in shuniya . Being in relationship with others, with all around me, simply by intention, by making the connection, and then letting go. Letting go of any knowledge or ideas I have about another person, of everything around me, so that I can connect with their soul, with the soul of everything.

I took this teaching with me throughout the week, and it brought me such peace. Which after the rebirthing classes at Yoga West, I have been going to, which really shakes things up, was a welcome relief. I experienced some very intense effects of the rebirthing catharsis.. The clearing of so much emotional and psychological blockage. I had two days of incredible close to unbearable anxiety, and then the gift that followed of a day of sobbing and sobbing, which was the best kind of crying. I released a massive anxiety blockage from within, and then a deeper level of peace ensued.

A few times this week when I felt in emotional pain, I visualized myself lying down in front of myself, and practiced the healing techniques of Sat Nam Rassayan. The rewards were instant and beautiful. I also saw a powerful and instant effect on a flu immersed child I was babysitting. I also took this teaching to a community yoga class I taught, and I felt the dimension that I really wanted to reach as a teacher, which had felt not too near, was now suddenly right there for me - at least for this class.  I kept focusing on shuniya and being in relationship with the souls of the students in the way I was taught to be in the Sat Nam Rassayan class. I was teaching the class as a healer. It was so peaceful for all of us in that room. One student said afterwards that she had kept trying yoga, but had not had an experience that suited her yet, and this was the first class she had enjoyed. I have heard many yoga teachers advise students to just keep going to different classes, because if one teacher isn’t for you someone else will be eventually. I wondered if as teachers we all have a lot more opportunity to be what all the students need, by continually increasing our ability to communicate directly with the souls and to bypass any ego communication, consistently. I guess this is very likely what many advanced, long time yoga teachers are doing. I felt like I’d stumbled across a trade secret ☺

It is funny how not simple and not easy it is, even armed with some great teachings and tools, and a real desire to be our true and highest self, how challenging it is to not get caught up in ego stories and defense, judgment of others and self, struggles. Ignorance runs so deep, so it feels at times. The following week I taught the same class, and I wanted so much to make that magical connection I had the week before – but it was a different day, a different me, a different week. I couldn’t get to that same incredible place.  Sometimes for everyone in any profession I would imagine, you’re just not in the zone, but you can’t get caught up and worried about it. You have to just take care of business and do your best. So I did, and the class was appreciated, it was a decent offering. Some days it’s like we get to touch magic so clearly and beautifully, and other days we don’t as obviously. I think one of the most powerful teachings I’ve come across in my life is acceptance of what is…

By Maya Lee





Got my Wings!

We are half way through the Teacher training course at Yoga West now and White Tantric yoga was two months ago. I found a pair of wings on the beach the day after the White Tantric Yoga course. It wasn’t a pretty spectacle, but very symbolic some might say. The bird was all eaten away but the wings remained. I can identify with feeling like that sometimes… Middle age… Before this find, I had been finding single feathers on my path continually for months. I heard that finding feathers means angels are telling you they are present. So when I found a whole set of wings I was over the moon! I felt like I was being shown I’d made it through to the next tier of personal development... as I had recently dealt with a lot of difficult issues in my life, strongly focusing on using angelic qualities, which had not been at all easy…

Since writing the White Tantric Yoga blog I can say that it is remarkable to me how different I feel now. I feel a lot more reverence for the work we are doing, more gratitude for the experience I am having. I feel more gentleness towards others with my vision, more willingness to be more open, more courage to fail, to succeed. 

It was my first time getting up to teach as a Kundalini Yoga Teacher this last teacher training week-end. I was very nervous beforehand, worried I wouldn’t be any good… I shared this with a few other students who said ‘but you’re an actress and a singer..’ thinking it therefore seemed odd that I would be nervous to perform anything in front of a crowd. I replied ‘Yes but I usually know what I’m doing..’ I wasn’t sure what kind of a Kundalini Yoga teacher I would make. Not knowing if anything was going to dance through me at all, or if I’d be left alone and bare with nothing to share. As I sat there waiting for my turn, I thought of the things I had learned as a singer/songwriter and realized that a lot of it applied now. The importance of understanding that this is not about me, that it’s about the work that can come through me if I humble myself to it, if I let it sing me, like I do my songs. Guru Raj, our teacher, had said some of the same things to us about teaching that I had learned from performing my songs. She said that we need to get over ourselves, and not be so self indulgent by being nervous. That it isn’t about us!  

Once in the teacher’s seat I just felt really comfortable and warm. There was an energy that was taking care of everything and doing a decent job through me. Spirit was able to use me.  I felt very relieved and grateful for this. Afterwards when I got home, I felt a really strong sense of my Sat Nam, my true identity. A power I can feel disconnected from often. The feedback I received reflected the way the experience had felt for me.

I learned a pretty good lesson from doing Open mic regularly at one particular place where the audience mostly of other artists drink and talk loudly with their friends throughout the night. They don’t pay that much attention to the artists on the stage, unless they are their friends. It’s a tough gig for most artists, however skilled or talented they may be. I’ve seen many a disheartened looking new performer there. But sometimes spirit really speaks beautifully through an artist, and it turns the audiences heads, they listen powerfully and the atmosphere is incredible. I got up on that stage many, many times giving it all with my songs and singing, eventually I got to a point where I didn’t care if most of them ignored me or not. It has been my experience that when I don’t need any validation at all from others that this is when I enter a sweet zone, when spirit can speak, and success with whatever I’m doing is most likely to come. 

I understood while I practiced alone on the stage in that room of about 200 people week after week, being largely ignored, that I was strengthening my ability to really connect with the crowd from my heart. – an ability to connect with real authenticity, to be truly genuine and humble to the experience – to just simply be there without a need from the crowd for anything for myself, just a desire to connect my heart with theirs. I did get there in the end, to the magic place, after many performances, and I grateful that I am well received these days.

I appreciate that this experience transfers to teaching Kundalini yoga. Yet I am also aware of the underdeveloped skills sets I have that this course calls for and inspires me to work harder at – which are also transferable with music – the donkey work some call it – work that is arduous because things don’t just happen – it requires focused attention, repeatedly. A lot of self discipline has to be put in for the best gems to be released. I woke at 4.44 this morning to a dream voice telling me to ‘master self discipline’. Now that would be an achievement!

By Maya Lee

White Tantric Yoga

Vancouver, Winter 2015

I arrived at a church hall in Kerrisdale on a Saturday morning in November to a sea of white bodies and white head wear. There was a feeling in the air similar to a line of people waiting to bungee jump or parachute out of a plane. The head count was estimated at 200. Energy was buzzy with eager anticipation, and some fear from first timers who had heard stories of the extremities to expect of this day.

There was a large group of us from the Kundalini Yoga Teacher Training course with Yoga West, Vancouver. A one day White Tantric Yoga Course is mandatory to graduate the Kundalini Yoga teacher training course, as taught by Yogi Bhajan. There were also many people there not on a teacher training program. Some had been to many White Tantric Yoga days in other places in North America, and some in other countries. We were a combination of total newbies and of old students of this practice. My group had all heard stories of how this practice takes you beyond your mind’s ideas of physical limitations, and merges you with spirit, which knows you are unlimited, and therefore it will be your spirit that helps you to keep going for over an hour sometimes, with exercises that in a regular Kundalini Yoga class may be done for just a few minutes. We all confessed some nervousness and worry before. However, I think it was agreed by many of us, that it really wasn’t that bad… and for some of us the benefits were radically huge very soon afterwards.

The day began with us seated in rows facing our partners, forming a chain. The facilitator/esteemed spiritual teacher sat on a platform at the head of us. She described a stream of cosmic energy moving above our heads, gathering suffering, grief, pain, our karma. If there was anything in particular we wanted to chuck out into this stream we were invited to do that. This stream would then form a point and flow straight to the teacher, who would then, as taught by Yogi Bhajan, direct the flow to the Golden temple, a place where the divine abides. We were handing it all over to a spiritual teacher to hand to God/the divine energy of creation, for a kind of purification.

We were guided to choose an intention for the day. I chose to see life through eyes that were not coloured by any pain of past experiences. To dump all into that cosmic stream. I realized this was a pretty big request…

I had 4 days afterwards of experiencing a highly charged powerful sense of being in a very clear way. I felt as happy as a child, when it came to my birthday, a few days later. It really was as if I was seeing through eyes of no past pain. I felt held by a sea of angels, but at the same time like the angel was me. It was quite incredible. I’m 48yrs old, and I felt as energized as I use to when I was in my early twenties. I was free of some usually very apparent to me, feelings of self punishment and regret. I walked up a steep hill on a walk I do often, and I didn’t notice the steep hill at all! I walked it as if it was flat land.

Additionally, Guru Raj, one of our teacher trainers, told us the last YTT week-end, that life can get a little crazy while doing this course, things will change. On that note, I have longed for my daughter and granddaughter to come to live in Vancouver from the UK for quite a while, and suddenly, on day five after White Tantra, and on day 32 of 40 days of our Kirtan Kriya meditation commitment, I received a call from my daughter. They are suddenly moving to live in Vancouver next Monday…

The extent of what I have needed to organize last minute has been quite huge! But this is wonderful news...

The facilitator for the day, Sardarni Guru Amrit Kaur Khalsa had such a grace and gentleness about her. It was very inspiring to see gentleness in a strong position working so powerfully and effectively to help others.

Kerry Bjarnason in my group in the YTT program said this about White Tantra:

I loved, loved, loved it.  I would go again in a heartbeat.  Very good experience for me on the personal, partner, group energy levels.  Certainly confirmed my belief in the veracity of the 1st sutra

(The first sutra: Recognize the other person is you)

Me: (to my partner of the White Tantric Yoga Day, Simone from Calgary)

What is your understanding of why this one day course is considered compulsory by Yogi Bhajan for teachers to graduate?

Simone Zabik: To activate discipline and emphasize the importance of caliber to my current state of mind within the practice of Kundalini yoga. It is 100% imperative that each teacher must experience this as life is a sequence of experiences. As yogi Bhajan declared – “keep up and you will be kept up.” White Tantric is done with reverence thus personal karma is let go of.  This is essential in developing caliber to teach Kundalini Yoga, as a teacher must truly live each moment in reverence and whole heartedly practice this. 

by Maya Lee

For more information on White Tantra Yoga, visit http://www.whitetantricyoga.com

India is Awakening Within

Adjusting to ‘normal’ life after completing the first module of my Kundalini Yoga teacher training program has been…well, there are no words. And there are so many words. My whole being feels very full of insights, knowledge, understanding, and gratitude.

Being sequestered for five days in a house full of yogis, with daily meditations starting at 4am, physically challenging classes, and yes, a snoring roommate, put me out of my comfort zone in a big way. I embraced it all as gracefully as I could – though there were definitely a couple of clunky moments!

My Kundalini adventure is just beginning. I have three more modules to complete, plus daily homework of yoga, reading, and meditation till the program finishes in May 2016.

I’m seeing why it took the amount of time it did for me to get here. The seeds of this journey were planted over ten years ago, when I took my first Kundalini Yoga class and knew there was something very special about the technology. Even then I knew that this path couldn’t be pursued halfheartedly; it requires a level of commitment and discipline that I wasn’t prepared for until now. Actually, I still feel unprepared – but that’s a story of limitation I’m ready to break through.

I understand why I’ve spent so many years alone, exploring different teachings, and delving into my shadow and dark feelings. It’s all been preparation for a new way of being.

‘Surrender’ and ‘trust’ are recurring themes in the blogs I read. If humanity is indeed evolving in consciousness, we must let go of the idea that God/Universe/Source is out to get us. That is an old paradigm. We’re moving into the deep knowing that we are fundamentally good and not fundamentally flawed (as many traditional religions would have us believe). We’re much more than the duality we live in.

To surrender and trust means giving up the need to control every facet of our lives (or rather, releasing the illusion that that’s even possible). During our morning mediations, I felt so much tension in my face…clenched jaw, scrunched up eyes…the stress of thinking, worrying, and holding on. My body is so ready to let that all go.

We don’t need to try so hard; the universe remembers connections we’ve made and seeds we’ve planted. Last month I received an unexpected email from a former employer, asking if I’d be interested in writing a blog post for her spiritual travel company. For a time I’d worked as the company’s social media coordinator, and blogging was my favourite aspect of that role. I was very happy to have that opportunity arise once again.

I found myself writing about India. She is playing a very big role in my life right now, as I study the yogic teachings and feel the presence of my ancestors all around me. I’m discovering a part of myself that I buried a long time ago. India is awakening within.

Nothing is ever lost, if it’s in alignment with who we really are and what we love to do. Things are always cycling back to us in newer, more refined forms as we experience, learn, and clarify. It’s about shifting the power from the mind to the heart.

Time to head to my local Kundalini Yoga class – today’s homework! :)

Until next time,
Aleya

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